Libido, that little word that gets so much attention, can sometimes play tricks on us. Whether you’ve been in a relationship for years or are just starting a new one, you may have faced moments when your sexual desire seemed… on vacation.
Don’t stress – it’s TOTALLY NORMAL and COMMON. In this article, we’ll explore what libido really is, debunk the myths surrounding it, and give you practical tips to stimulate it.
Whether you’re looking to reignite the spark or simply understand your desire better, you’re in the right place.
What exactly is libido?
Libido, a word we often hear but don’t always understand, is simply your sexual desire. In psychology, libido is the energy of your “life instincts,” particularly “sexual instincts”. It’s that urge that draws you towards your partner, that makes your heart beat a little faster when you think about intimate moments. Libido is like the engine of your sex life !
This engine can accelerate or slow down… and that’s normal. Sexual desire isn’t something constant or permanent. Many factors cause our desires to fluctuate, and when desire seems to fade from our couple life, we call it a “decrease in libido”.
What is a decrease in libido?
Imagine an engine idling or temporarily stopping. A decrease in libido is when you feel less desire, less sexual appetite than usual. It can happen to anyone, at any time in life.
Beware of generalizations ! We’re addressing couples who generally have a fulfilling sex life and encounter a problem at a given time. Some people don’t have a libido, and this article isn’t addressed to them. Sexuality in a couple isn’t synonymous with happiness or love.
Your libido varies and that’s normal !
Your libido isn’t a straight line on a graph. It fluctuates, it dances, it has its ups and downs, its debates too. It’s completely natural ! Sometimes it will be at its peak, other times it will take a little nap. Don’t worry, it’s the nature of libido to be variable.
Focus on prejudices
Let’s talk about these preconceived ideas that pollute our minds.
Here are the worst:
“A real man/woman always wants it”: False! Libido isn’t a competition.
“If I don’t want to, it means I don’t love my partner anymore”: Not at all! Love and desire aren’t always synchronized.
“Libido necessarily decreases with age”: Not necessarily! Some discover a second sexual youth later in life.
Potential causes of loss
It can be influenced by many factors:
Stress, THE real disease of our century (that great thief of desire!)
Fatigue (it’s hard to feel desire when you’re exhausted)
Hormonal changes, difficult to find a more related factor when talking about desire
Certain medications, have you started a treatment and noticed a decrease in desire? Read the notices carefully and talk to your doctor
Relationship problems
Poor body image, yes, self-esteem has a big psychological impact and affects our desires
Poor diet or excesses, some foods unfortunately cause a decrease in libido, not to mention the big baddies that are alcohol and tobacco (advice: stop)
Never hesitate to make an appointment with a sexologist, when you’re sick you go to a doctor, right ?
Our tips to stimulate your desire
Here’s our top 10 (non-exclusive) tips to awaken your libido :
Communicate with your partner : talk about it openly, without taboo.
Take care of yourself : a healthy mind in a healthy body !
Manage your stress : Meditation, yoga, sports… Find what relaxes you.
Consult a professional if necessary : Sometimes, expert advice can make all the difference.
Our Couple Game app to awaken libido !
Nothing like a little playful spice to awaken desire !
Our Couple Game app is designed to stimulate your creativity and libido. With exciting challenges and intimate questions, it can help you rediscover pleasure as a couple and boost your desire in a fun and original way.
Remember, every couple is unique, and there’s no miracle solution. The important thing is to stay in tune with yourself and your partner. Libido is like a plant (yes, we love metaphors): with attention, patience, and proper care, it will bloom again ! 🌼
